Got this from email..
Here's a thing to brighten up your damp days.
1. YnaKi - An Eat Bulaga contestant was asked by Joey and Vic: Ano sa Tagalog ang grasshopper?
Contestant: Ahmm. . .Huling Hapunan?
3. Myckle Mouse - In Wowowee, the question was: Kung ang sigaw ay shout sa Inggles, ano naman sa Tagalog ang whisper?
The contestant answered: Napkin!
6. Ker - My cousin at a DRIVE-THRU: Miss, puwedeng take out?
10. Marissa - My friend said: Ang galing no, yung Ash Wednesday last year , Miyerkules din pumatak!
14. No name - We were marketing for an org event, when one of my orgmates wanted to clear the definition of the types of sponsors (Major, Minor, Patron, etc.)
So she asked her grandma: L0la, anong mas mataas sa Patron?
Her L0la replied: Patron? Eh di Shell!
17. Epoy - One classmate in highschool said, Ang cute naman ng sintas mo, luminou! I corrected him and said, gluminous! Then he replied, Oo nga pala, plural!
19. Jen - Sa isang gameshow, tinanong ng host: Anong P ang Tagalog ng storey o floor ng building? Contestan: PIP PLOR!
21. Rome - I had a customer on the line who had a password on his account. I asked for the password but he forgot. I gave him a clue: Its a 4-digit number.He answered, Uhm ROCKY?
22. Slowbyslow - I overheard a lady place an order at Starbucks: One cup of chino please.
27. Jonalou22 - From the gameshow The Weakest Link.
Host Edu Manzano asked: Anong T ang ibinibigay ng konduktor pag nagbayad ka ng pamasahe sa bus?
Ian Veneracion answered: TUKLI!
28. Joeygirl - We were reviewing for an exam and we were already dead tired. A classmate said, Hala, brownout! Pagtingin namin, nakapikit pala siya.
30. Lewi - Manang, pabili ng bellpepper..
Manang: Bellpepper?! Ah.. Long o short?!
(Lewi clueless Lumapit si Manang hawak-hawak ang bond paper.)
Lewi: Ah, Manang hindi po bondpepper.. Bellpepper!